Michael el Chayil

I am a physicist by predilection and training. I made a living programming computers for decades. I feel I can make the following statement as a domain expert in the area of reality: There is no physical law, nor is there any computer instruction that ends with "except in cases of great monetary loss or pressing circumstances." When I had cancer, not a single doctor—and I was very fortunate to have had two Jewish, Torah-observant doctors managing my case—said that I needed chemotherapy... unless that would cause me to incur a great monetary loss or if it was just too much pressure. (It was, in fact, both; in spades.) This has nothing to do with anything, but my grammar checker didn't like that last parenthetical statement. So I asked Gemini about it, and I got the following response: This statement is an idiomatic construction used to confirm that something possesses two distinct qualities or characteristics simultaneously, and to an extreme or significant degree. "I...

I am currently saying kaddish for my mother-in-law, a"h. I have also organized learning mishnayos as an elevation for her neshama. I feel honored to be able to do this; she was important in our lives, and the way she reared my wife prepared her to be able to grow into a fully Torah-observant bas yisrael. I also learn mishnayos for the yahrtzeit of my father, a"h, and my father-in-law, a"h. Again, it is a zchus for me, and I do not take that lightly. I do neither of those things for my mother. No complaints, just saying. For whatever reason (likely because I am in the middle of doing so much for our Jewish parents right now), though, I decided to ask R' Fuerst this year if I should  be doing any of those things for my own mother. I started with, "I haven't been saying kaddish for my mother on her yahrtzeit; should I be?" (My follow-up question would have been, "Jewish or Goyish calendar?") The dayan answered, "It's a free country....

I endeavor to make a siyum every year on my anniversary/birthday. Last year I made a siyum on Nedarim, leaving just Nazir and Sotah to complete Seder Nashim (of gemara). That  meant that I would be making a siyum on Seder Nashim for my 50th wedding anniversary. Cool, no? As it turns out, though, I have actually made progress in my learning skills and/or I have retired, so I have more time to learn in the mornings. In any case, I now learn two or three daf a week instead of one. That  means that I can be m'sayim Seder Nashim this year, בעזרת השם, on our 49th wedding anniversary. (I don't feel the coolness of making the siyum on year 50 would justify delaying; besides, I concocted a justification.) That  meant, though, that I had to find another date to sponsor kiddush at our Vasikin Minyan for the siyum. This is my morning seder at Brisk. I learn before davening in the winter and after davening in the summer, so I like to make the siyum there. Also, it is where my wif...

Yes, I know very well that I have not written in quite some time. A discovery we made while cleaning out my mother-in-law's apartment seems a very fitting topic for my re-entry. After days and hours of sorting through boxes of documents and pictures, we were rewarded with two notable treasures: (1) a pair of diamond studs that had been presumed lost. (2) my mother-in-law's bas mitzvah speech. In truth, the value of the diamond studs pales in comparison to the speech find, but we had talked about those diamond studs for weeks (in fact, my mother-in-law, a"h, had also been bothered by their loss). The speech (and picture of her from that day!) solidified and deepened our appreciation for how much we owe to my mother-in-law, ברכה פייגא בת יעקב, ע''ה, A few years ago, I read a powerful משל/allegory in the Passover haggadah from R' Matisyahu Salomon. There was a bloke who wanted to know what it felt like to get the royal treatment. He hatched a plan to dupe a remote...

My mother was 20 when I was born, and she passed away at 69. Do the math; I knew her for 69 years—though one could argue that the first year or two, at least, can hardly be counted as knowing someone. I met my wife on Oct 30, 1977; I was 19. We became engaged on Dec 17. Of course I had met my future in-laws before Dec 17, but after that I was invited to family dinner every Sunday. I will, בעזרת השם, turn 69 this year. Do the math; I knew my mother-in-law for 69 years—all of which (except that last 18 hours or so of her life) were unarguably time of full awareness to know someone. I am as qualified as any, and more than most, to give you an honest perspective on a life well lived. Since my mother-in-law's funeral was during Nissan, there were no eulogies. That is, speeches designed to bring the listeners to tears. I told those assembled that our tears are a comfort to the soul of the departed, as they can feel that they made a difference in this world. In this month, whose name mean...

As you may know, Pesach is less than 30 days away. You know that either because (1) we are past Purim and Pesach is always 30 days after Purim, or (2) the most oft-heard phrase in your home is, "Aaaagh!!! Pesach is less than a month away!!! Aaaagh!!" (Number of exclamation points is based on estimates by someone who no longer has children at home. Your level of stress and urgency may vary.) You would think that the oven, which has been filled with hot chameitz all year and now needs to be a completely chametz-free zone, would be a  huge  stress point. Nope. Preparing the oven nowadays is an eerily calm island in a sea of frustration. That is because the very same heat that created the problem can now be used to solve it. The basic rule is the way the chameitz went in is how we take it out. Of course, since it is Pesach, we are way stringent. Besides that, we like to destroy the chameitz instead of just removing it (which has its own disposal and contamination issues; not ...

Now that we know what bracha to make on non-kosher food, as detailed in this TftD , we are ready to address the original-ish question. (It is only "-ish" because that question was about water, which gets a resounding "no," but the question of using non-kosher wine is still open.) But, first, a joke. A Jew is meeting with a non-Jew at the non-Jew's house while the non-Jew is having a snack of ham and wine. (The reaons for the meeting and why at the house of the non-Jew and why the non-Jew choose this moment to eat are all beyond the scope of this joke.) The non-Jew is cordial and offers the Jew some ham. "No thank you. We only eat kosher food." The non-Jew is a bit surprised (again, outside the scope of this joke), but still wants to be a good host. "Well, may I at least offer you some wine, then?" The Jew replies that we drink kosher wine. Now then non-Jew cannot contain himself, "So if there was only non-kosher food and wine available, ...

The discussion started with, "If one of the hostages in the tunnels found some water, could he use that to make kiddush?" The answer to that question is a definitive "No." You just can't make kiddush on water (Shulchan Aruch 272:9). The Mishna Brura refers us to 296:2, sk 10, and notes that you also may not use water for havdala, and that is true even if the primary beverage in your country is water; it is just not considered prestigious enough to use for kiddush. Even crazy expensive—apparently there are "extreme luxury" waters that go for more than 10k$ for a rivi'is—still can't use it to make kiddush. Okay... but all this got me thinking... what exactly are the rules regarding eating non-kosher food when one is in danger of dying without eating that food? When I started, I was pretty sure that one would not make kiddush using non-kosher wine. Using non-kosher wine or food just didn't seem appropriate for kiddush. I also wondered what bra...

When relating the story of Eliezer, the servant of Avraham, seeking a proper shidduch for Yitzchak, the Torah repeats the story four times: Eliezer tells us what he wants to happen, then the events unfold, then Eliezer tells Rivka's family what he wanted to happen, and then Eliezer tells Rivka's family what actually transpired (with some minor but quite significant modifications). On that, Rashi comments (B'reishis 24:42): Rabbi Acha said: The ordinary conversation of the servants of the Patriarchs is more beloved before the Omnipresent than the Torah of their sons, for the section dealing with Eliezer is repeated in the Torah, whereas many fundamentals of the Torah were given only through allusions. An example of one of those allusions is in this week's parasha, כי תשא. We have two full parashas and the beginning of a third that give all the details regarding construction of the mishkan, all its vessels, the vestments of the kohanim while working there, and the incense...

Maybe you have already heard... I find myself having particular difficulty not repeating myself. 30 years cancer free, ביום הזה ממש/on this very day. This very day, Purim, 30 years ago, the doctor called me at 4:00-ish PM to tell me that I was cured of cancer. Every year since then I have made my first s'udah on Purim in the morning (which the Rema says is just fine, 695:2, smart guy), and it doubles as a סעודת הודיה/meal to give thanks to the Creator. Oh, you'd like the back story? In Oct/Nov of 1996, I visited the doctor because I had bronchitis. We only had one car at the time, and my daughter was also under the weather, so I went to our family practitioner to make things easier. She, the doctor, diagnosed me with bronchitis—which I routinely got that time of year in Chicago—and prescribed a course of antibiotics. Usually that did the trick, but this time the illness hung on. Before going back to that doctor, I mentioned to a chaver of mine that I was seeing a woman doctor, ...

Some time ago, I found this cool olive oil store that imported the oil in the original casks. You bought at much as you wanted and paid for that amount. They also sold bottles in which you could take your oil home. Two issues: (1) I had to double-check the reliability of the hechsher (the oils were infused). (2) Did I have to buy the bottles, tovel them, and then bring them back to get the oil? On the second issue, I spoke with R' Fuerst. We discussed a few options, but at the conclusion, the dayan decided that I didn't need to tovel the bottle at all. How does that work? They want to sell me olive oil, but they need to put it into a container for me to get it home. So I buy the oil and tell them which container I want them to put it in. As far as I am concerned, I am only buying oil. They charge me a fee for the bottle, but I am never really buying the bottle. The bottle is still owned by the goy when it is filled with oil, and the bottle is בטול/completely secondary to the oi...

On 18 Tammuz, 5785 (July 14, 2025 for us gringos), I was studying folio 98 in Masechta Shabbos about the קרשים/planks of the mishkan. I know the date because my rebbi, R' Dovid Siegel, shlita, told me that it is very easy to fool oneself into thinking you understand something when learning without a chavrusa. Therefore, my rebbi told me to write down any and all questions and/or impressions I have while learning to keep myself as honest as possible. (Ok, ok... writing down the date was my own OC idea.) In any case, the Gemara there discusses the precise shape of the  קרשים/planks  and how they were loaded on the two carts. The common translation of עצי שיטים is "Acacia wood." It was way more detail than I expected—but, hey, it's Chazal—so I spent quality time on it. It just happened (uh-huh) that they were replacing some old telephone poles in the neighborhood when I was learning that topic (thank you, HaShem), and I determined that each  קרש/plank  was abo...

I believe I am not the only one who sometimes feels like no matter how he tries, it just doesn't go. I know כִּ֤י שֶׁ֨בַע יִפּ֣וֹל צַדִּ֣יק וָקָ֑ם/A tzadik falls seven times and gets up Which means that part of the process of becoming a tzadik is to fall. I get that. But let's do a calculation. Fall twice a day, times six days per week (I got Shabbos off), times 52 weeks per year, times 30 years comes to a grand total of just under 20k tumbles, give or take. Even if math is not your strong suit, that is pretty clearly more than 7.  Falling over and over again, though, kinda sounds like just constantly stumbling, as described at the end of that same verse: וּ֜רְשָׁעִ֗ים יִכָּשְׁל֥וּ בְרָעָֽה/and the evildoers will stumble upon evil I once asked my rebbi about what to do about constantly being a failure. He looked at me (always a warning sign) and asked why I thought I was a failure. I explained the situation to him. He asked, "Are you still alive?" "Umm... yes; th...

For many years now (decades, actually... wow!), we have been getting together with close friends on Shabbos after the vasikin minyan to make kiddush, have a bite to eat—sometimes just pastries, chips, and stuff, sometimes a full-blown s'uda. In any case, the one who makes kiddush has always sat for the kiddush ceremony. One week, he stood. Why he did that, what our response was—and what it should have been (our halachic response, I mean... we were all a bit taken by surprise), what the different parts of the kiddush service are, and why people do different things are all, b'ezras HaShem, topics we'll cover in this TftD. Strap in. The kiddush ceremonies on Friday night and Shabbos are somewhat different. Friday night fulfills a Torah obligation and is beautified with Rabbinic enhancements. We start with a declaration/testimony that HaShem created the world in six and then capped it all off with Shabbos, aka וַיְכֻלּ֛וּ. We then proceed with the actual kiddush blessing, which...

In English we have the term "pregnant pause," which means a deliberate, often long, and sometimes uncomfortable moment of silence in speech, acting, or conversation that is "full of" meaning, significance, or anticipation. There are also dramatic and poignant pauses, which are typically shorter. All three techniques can be used to build suspense (pregnant), add emphasis to the point just made  (dramatic) , and/or encourage introspection and allow the matter to be internalized (poignant). They can each be used for any of those effects; I just indicated the most usual flavor of pause used in each situation... in my humble opinion. The ellipsis in the preceding sentence was meant to convey a poignant pause and encourage the reader to form their own thoughts on the topic. All this is to make the communication more engaging. <Feel free to fill in your own thoughts here while I make myself a cup of coffee.> It is also possible for a pause to turn into an interruptio...

The C humash shiur given by  R' Schwimmer at the Tessler home each Friday night during the (extended) winter season is always filled with chidushim and gives me a new perspective on the parasha in particular and Chumash in general. Some shiurim, though, just "hit me where I live." R' Schwimmer gave us particularly deep insight into the machlokes brought by the ba'al hagada about whether there were 10, 40, or 50 plagues in Mitzrayim. Before that, though, we need some preliminaries. Chazal (and, in fact, ancient philosophy/science in general, beginning with the Greeks) talk about the four elements: fire, air, water, and earth. You may be thinking, "Hah! Those silly old fashioned thinkers! Now, of course, we know there are over 100 elements!" The fact that chemists -- who are just the modern incarnation of alchemists -- call those "elements" is no more impressive to me than what rabbis of the Reform Jewish Religion call Torah. In fact, the word ...

I decided when I added a full morning seder to my learning schedule, that I should put some time into learning the prophets. I have read (I wish I could say "learned", but... ) the so-called נביאים ראשונים/early prophets, so now it is time to dive into נביאים אחרונים/later prophets. I strive to be irritatingly consistent, so obviously I started in order from the beginning with ישעיה/Isaiah. My Hebrew is fairly good, so I opted to learn -- on the advice of one of the foremost authorities on Tanach in Chicago -- from the R' Kook series, which is an excellent guide in modern Hebrew by Orthodox sources. After trying for more than a year and making little progress, I admitted to myself that my Hebrew is just not that good and and now learning from the really, really excellent ArtScroll -- The Milstein Edition -- prophets, which includes Rashi, Metzuda, Radak, and a beautiful English elucidation. I am now making palpable progress. Since there are so many haftarahs are taken fro...

In the old days, I got most of my exercise by riding my bike to/from work four days a week. Then Covid hit, so I started just taking 10-12 mile rides at noon-ish just to keep up the exercise. Then winter would hit and I switched to treadmill. (I think "detest" is too strong a word for how I feel about walking on a treadmill, but only a bit too strong.) I often worked from home on Fridays, so I would walk to/from shul on Fridays to get some steps in. Now that I am learning and working close to home, I've decided to walk to/from shul everyday. During the winter? I bundle up and walk faster. When it snows? Boots. When it is icy... so that's where this starts. Not only have I been learning/davening at the same place, bli ayin hara, every morning for over 30 years, I have also been sitting next to the same dear friend for a good portion of that time. He is more or less used to me. Just to level set this. I am at shul in the mornings for about three hours each morning betwe...