Avraham Avinu, on the third day after performing a difficult and sensitive surgery on himself at age 99 -- not to mention that it was without the use of anesthetic -- was very distraught because he didn't have guests to serve. Out of compassion, HaShem sent three angels, disguised as regular travelers, to allow Avraham Avinu to perform his beloved work of hospitality to strangers. Besides the physical chesed -- food, drink, and rest -- it provided to his guests, Avraham Avinu also used that time to bring knowledge and belief in HaShem to the masses. In this case, he ran to the wayfarers to be sure they didn't pass him by, then offered them a bit of food, drink, and rest. That's what he offered, but he actually served them butter and milk, then tongue with mustard. And then our illustrious ancestor stood there as a waiter to care for them during their repast.
Any normal person should have his breath taken away by the image of the royal and righteous Avraham Avinu -- in his advanced age and while still recovering from surgery -- serving guests with grace and generosity. I suspect I have never, even in my best days, come close to the hospitality offered by Avraham Avinu.
That should be enough. But, you know... we're Jews and so we look at the story and say, "Hey! He offered bread, but he didn't bring any!" Really? Yes; we are, after all, his children; and children are often the most discerning critics of their parents. So let's analyze.
The Rashbam says that of course Avraham Avinu brought bread. The verses don't mention it? Of course not, because it's obvious. The verses mention the butter and milk and tongue with mustard is something else. Those require preparation immediately before they are served -- especially in those days before refrigeration, so the verses make special mention.
Be that as it may, Rashi (quoting Chazal, Bava Metzia 87a) says that while Sara was preparing the bread she became a nida just then and so the dough became tamei. Again... just forget that an 89 year old woman is working to bake fresh bread for three presumed idol worshipers -- in the midst of also caring for and worrying about her 99 year old husband who is recovering from a difficult surgery, and just happens to become a nida for the the first time in who knows how many decades. No, forget all that and focus on the bread that is now tamei, so can't be served.
Let us add one more layer of chutzpah -- "What?", we ask ourselves, "Just because Avraham Avinu has a personal stringency to not eat tamei bread, why should his guests suffer?"
I found a Rabeinu Bachya that I think is a key to putting this all together. (The term "found" is a wee bit strange, since the commentary of Rabeinu Bachya has been around for about 800 years and actually in my house on my bookshelf for the last 20 years. Oh well... better late than never.) The Rabeinu Bachya reminds us that it was Pesach. When Sara Imeinu suddenly became a nida and realized that the dough was now tamei, she went to ask her husband what to do. Since it was pesach, though, that meant the dough was left without being actively kneaded for a few minutes... and is not potentially chametz on Pesach! Of course, then, the dough needed to be destroyed immediately.
I think we can put this all together as follows. As the Rashbam says, bread was served at the meal. After all, bread is usually already prepared and readily available. However, it was not the bread that Sara Imeinu started making to give extra honor to the guests, because -- as Rashi says -- the dough became tamei. Then, as Rabeinu Bachya tells us, because of the surprise and extra diligence of Sara Imeinu, became chametz and had to be destroyed.
As is often the case when children question their parents -- our saintly ancestors were acting with extreme care for human dignity and did everything possible to treat their guests -- who appeared as idol worshiping wayfarers -- as angels.
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