Skip to main content

Thought for the Day: Ahavas Yisrael and Kirvas HaShem

Sefer Chafeitz Chaim prefaces hilchos lashon hara with a list of all the positive and negative commandments that are or could be transgressed by speaking lashon hara; collateral damage, as it were.  Negative commandments 8 and 9 (grouped in one section) is revenge and holding a grudge.  Holding a grudge he describes as "n'tira b'leiv" -- even feeling slighted (with no outward action) is considered a transgression of the issur d'oraisa of n'tira.  In the B'er Maiyim Chaim he justifies that concept based on the Sefer haChinuch, Rambam, and others.

Yikes.

Perhaps it is worth spending some time understanding how the Torah can assur even feeling slighted and wanting to get even without acting on those feelings at all.  The first thing of note is that the issur against holding a grudge is not where I expected it.  I expected to find it in parshas Mishpatim.  In reality, the issur is not even in sefer Shmos; it is in Vayikra in, of all places, K'doshim T'hiyu -- you shall be holy.  The context is also strange.  It starts with very human laws concerning gossip, hatred, and revenge; then it suddenly jumps to chukim (laws with no rational basis, such as kashrus and sha'atnez) and ends with korbanos.  Eh?

Here is my thought on the matter.  I would have thought that religiosity begins with the Temple service and praying to G-d.  Then comes kashrus, sha'atnez, etc.  Then I, if I want extra credit, I can start reproving other.  Eventually I might get to gossip and loving other people.

Here is the Torah's thought on the matter.  You want to be close to G-d?  Start by being scrupulous in your legal dealings with others.  Then be very careful about speaking negative about another Jew.  Do not harbor any ill feelings toward another Jew; G-d knows what you are thinking, so be very nervous about this one.  Now you can start constructive criticism, but do it out of love and with no feeling of justifying your own actions; again, G-d is watching.  Now you can begin loving every Jew as you love yourself; obviously this includes never taking revenge or even holding a grudge (do you hold grudges against your children, for example?!?).  Now you are ready to start keeping the ordinances and statutes of the King.  You are probably reeling about your past bad actions; no worries, you can be forgiven -- that's why the Torah gave us korbanos.

That's just reading Vayikra 19:11-22 in order.  That's how you become a kadosh.  Being close to HaShem is the goal; loving each and every Jew is the means.
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Thought for the Day: Love in the Time of Corona Virus/Anxiously Awaiting the Mashiach

Two scenarios: Scenario I: A young boy awakened in the middle of the night, placed in the back of vehicle, told not to make any noise, and the vehicle speeds off down the highway. Scenario II: Young boy playing in park goes to see firetruck, turns around to see scary man in angry pursuit, poised to attack. I experienced and lived through both of those scenarios. Terrifying, no? Actually, no; and my picture was never on a milk carton. Here's the context: Scenario I: We addressed both set of our grandparents as "grandma" and "grandpa". How did we distinguish? One set lived less than a half hour's drive; those were there "close grandma and grandpa". The other set lived five hour drive away; they were the "way far away grandma and grandpa". To make the trip the most pleasant for all of us, Dad would wake up my brother and I at 4:00AM, we'd groggily -- but with excitement! -- wander out and down to the garage where we'd crawl
Post a Comment
Read more

Thought for the Day: אוושא מילתא Debases Yours Shabbos

My granddaughter came home with a list the girls and phone numbers in her first grade class.  It was cute because they had made it an arts and crafts project by pasting the list to piece of construction paper cut out to look like an old desk phone and a receiver attached by a pipe cleaner.  I realized, though, that the cuteness was entirely lost on her.  She, of course, has never seen a desk phone with a receiver.  When they pretend to talk on the phone, it is on any relatively flat, rectangular object they find.  (In fact, her 18 month old brother turns every  relatively flat, rectangular object into a phone and walks around babbling into it.  Not much different than the rest of us, except his train of thought is not interrupted by someone else babbling into his ear.) I was reminded of that when my chavrusa (who has children my grandchildrens age) and I were learning about אוושא מילתא.  It came up because of a quote from the Shulchan Aruch HaRav that referred to the noise of תקתוק
Post a Comment
Read more

Thought for the Day: David HaMelech's Five Stages of Finding HaShem In the World

Many of us "sing" (once you have heard what I call carrying a tune, you'll question how I can, in good conscience, use that verb, even with the quotation marks) Eishes Chayil before the Friday night Shabbos meal.  We feel like we are singing the praises of our wives.  In fact, I have also been to chasunas where the chasson proudly (sometimes even tearfully) sings Eishes Chayil to his new eishes chayil.  Beautiful.  Also wrong.  (The sentiments, of course, are not wrong; just a misunderstanding of the intent of the author of these exalted words.) Chazal (TB Brachos, 10a) tell us that when Sholmo HaMelech wrote the words "She opens her mouth Mwith wisdom; the torah of kindness is on her tongue", that he was referring to his father, Dovid HaMelech, who (I am continuing to quote Chazal here) lived in five worlds and sang a song of praise [to each].  It seems to me that "world" here means a perception of reality.  Four times Dovid had to readjust his perc
Post a Comment
Read more