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Thought for the Day: The Obligation to Rejoice Upon Receiving Bad News

First, please don't tell me: "There is no such thing as bad news! Everything is good!" Ok, Pollyanna, but Chazal say differently. In fact, the mishna (Brachos 54a) makes two statements about how to respond to בשורות רעות/bad news. First the mishna tells us the appropriate brachos for both good and bad news. On good news, we say: ברוך ההטוב והמטיב/Blessed is the (One who is) Good and the (One who) bestows good. On bad new, of course, we say: ברוך דיין האמת/Blessed is the True Judge. A few lines later, the mishna reveals this to us: חייב אדם לברך על הרע כשם שלברך על הטובה/A person is obligated (yes, חייב) to bless on bad news in the same way that he blesses on good news.

Rashi lets us know right away: This will be explained in the gemara. In other words, Rashi is letting us know: If you are confused, then you are learning the mishna correctly. We need Chazal to straighten this out for us.

The gemara on daf 60b works out the kinks for us. Except that I was having a lot of trouble even getting a surface understanding of the gemara. (I once read Kafka's explanation of a Kafka story. This felt like that.) Baruch HaShem -- I am retired (have I mentioned that?) and can spend time on things like this now. I looked through everyone in my gemara and got no satisfaction. I turned to Ein Yaakov and found that the רי''ף (R' Yoshiyahu Pinto (1565-1648), not R' Yaakov Alfasi (1013-1103), all CE) really puts all the pieces together and provides a straightforward explanation that will rock your world.

Here is the first thing we need to know (as the רי''ף explains): the gemara on 60b starts from the point of view that, in logic, one should make the same bracha on good and bad news: ברוך ההטוב והמטיב/Blessed is the (One who is) Good and the (One who) bestows good. Yes, you read correctly. The gemara is a bit surprised that we should make a different bracha on good and bad news. After all, we are only here for perfection of our souls, and only for a short period of time. This world is a rehab center; I don't care what they have to do, as long as each day begins and ends with, "You are doing great! You are in exactly the right place." And we have a guarantee from HaShem that every Jew has a golden ticket for Olam HaBah.

That being the case, the mishna has already told me that -- even understanding all that -- we make a different bracha on bad news than good news. Fine... so what does the mishna want from now by saying, but bless the same way on bad news as you do on good. Answer the gemara: your attitude. The Torah wants us to accept bad news with the same שמחה as we accept good news. The רי''ף goes through each of the proof texts to conclude that we are obligated to rejoice and sing -- זמרה, חדווה, שמחה -- when receiving bad news just as we do when receiving good news.

Think about one of your happiest moments -- getting married, the birth of a child, bringing a child to the chuppah, the birth of a grandchild, etc. Now think about some tragic news you have received. Did you react the same way? I certainly haven't. So how can Chazal tell us this is what the Torah expects of us?

I think this is similar to חַיָּב אָדָם לִרְאוֹת אֶת עַצְמוֹ כְּאִילּוּ הוּא יָצָא מִמִּצְרָיִם/a person is obligated to see himself as if he personally went out from Mitzrayim. That is the goal and the reality, but how are we actually supposed to accomplish that? We have a whole seder of simanim and stories and songs. We work on it.

Similarly here. The gemara immediately following is the exhortation from R' Akiva: לעולם יהא אדם רגיל לומר כל דעביד רחמנא לתב עביד/a person should always accustom himself to say that everything HaShem does is for the good. This is not a "one and done". I started by making fun of the Pollyanna who just blindly says, "There is no bad news; it's all good." I stand by that. If a person makes the bracha of ההטוב והמטיב upon hearing of the death of a loved one, he is making a vain blessing and profanes the name of Heaven. Chazal absolutely are not telling us we have an obligation to blindly say everything is good. On the contrary, Chazal absolutely are telling us that we are obligated to say, with eyes wide open and fully appreciating the depth and enormity of what we are experiencing, that everything is for the good.

If we just keep saying it -- לעולם יהא אדם רגיל לומר כל דעביד רחמנא לתב עביד -- eventually we will come to realize, believe, and even experience the reality that everything really is always for the good.

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