Skip to main content

Thought for the Day: Making Shiduchim LIke Ishei Tanach

I once received an email at 4:0x AM (on my phone... I wasn't on the computer!) from a colleague at work declining and invitation to a meeting I had called the previous day (that he had already missed, of course).  It was no chidush that I was up and around... it was summer time and I was on my way to the k'vasikin minyan.  I really wondered what he was doing up at that hour, though.  I asked him later that day and he told me he always gets up that early.  There were other co-workers there and they all nodded (with some reverence) that Tom did, indeed, always get up that early.  So... he was getting up early to decline an invitation to a meeting that had already occurred without him, and I was getting up early for an personal appointment with the Creator of the world.  Talk about "any maskimim l'divrei torah"/we get up early for communication with HaShem; "heim maskimim l'd'varim b'teilim"/they get up early for nothingness!

Unfortunately, we are not immune from getting our knickers in a twist of nothingness either, and shiduchim seems to be one of the casualties.  A neighbor of mine was looking into a shiduch for his daughter (this was 10 years ago or so) and the boy had asked (it was actually probably the mother that asked on her son's behalf) if his daughter wore a seat belt.  "Of course", he replied.  "Oh... that's not tznius; not the kind of girl for our family."  Darn right, we agreed.  His daughter was definitely not right for a family of nuts.

How did Ishei Tanach find their b'shert?  How about we start with Aaron, looking for a shidduch for his son Elezar.  Granted, he was not yet Aaron haCohein, but he was a navi and the brother of Moshe Rabeinu.  Aaron chose a girl who was descended from both Yisro and Yosef.  Imagine if Aaron when to a shadchan today to ask about that girl.  "Oh no!  Not for your family!  Her zaidy on one side used to fatten sheep for avoda zara.  The other side is better, but not much.  The zeidy was very fancy and went into business while all the rest of his family stayed in kollel."  (See Rashi to b'midbar, 31:6)

What about Y'hoshua?  He married Rachav.  The shadchan today would just stammer with embarrassment.  "Oh no!  She used to be a ... well... ahem... maybe you better just ask your rabbi."

And what was the result of these "reckless" shiduchim?  Elazar and his wife produced a Pinchus -- the only person other than Aaron to have the k'huna personally conferred by HaShem Himself.  Y'hoshua and Rachav produced a Yermiyahu; the navi who helps us till today endure galus and keep our hope alive for the rebuilding of the beis ha'mikdash, may it be soon and in our days.

Seems like Ishei Tanach were more interested in ba'alei aliyah with a proven track record of growth in Torah and avodas HaShem than in how many generations back the bubbies used the mikvah.  Not that I have anything against m'yuchasim, of course!  Some of my best friends are m'yuchasim.  You just have to be more thorough when you investigate them, that's all.
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Thought for the Day: Pizza, Uncrustables, and Stuff -- What Bracha?

Many years ago (in fact, more than two decades ago), I called R' Fuerst from my desk at work as I sat down to lunch.  I had a piece of (quite delicious) homemade pizza for lunch.  I nearly always eat at my desk as I am working (or writing TftD...), so my lunch at work cannot in any way be considered as sitting down to a formal meal; aka קביעת סעודה.  That being the case, I wasn't sure whether to wash, say ha'motzi, and bentch; or was the pizza downgraded to a m'zonos.  He told if it was a snack, then it's m'zonos; if a meal the ha'motzi.  Which what I have always done since then.  I recently found out how/why that works. The Shulchan Aruch, 168:17 discusses פשטיד''א, which is describes as a baked dough with meat or fish or cheese.  In other words: pizza.  Note: while the dough doesn't not need to be baked together with the meat/fish/cheese, it is  required that they dough was baked with the intention of making this concoction. ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Thought for the Day: What Category of Muktzeh are Our Candles?

As discussed in a recent TftD , a p'sak halacha quite surprising to many, that one may -- even לכתחילה -- decorate a birthday cake with (unlit, obviously) birthday candles on Shabbos. That p'sak is predicated on another p'sak halacha; namely, that our candles are muktzeh because they are a כלי שמלאכתו לאיסור and not  מוקצה מחמת גופו/intrinsically set aside from any use on Shabbos. They point there was that using the candle as a decoration qualifies as a need that allows one to utilize a כלי שמלאכתו לאיסור. Today we will discuss the issue of concluding that our candles are , in fact, a כלי שמלאכתו לאיסור and not מוקצה מחמת גופו. Along the way we'll also (again) how important it is to have personal relationship with your rav/posek, the importance of precision in vocabulary, and how to interpret the Mishna Brura.  Buckle up. After reviewing siman 308 and the Mishna Brura there, I concluded that it should be permissible to use birthday candles to decorate a cake on Sha...
Post a Comment
Read more

Thought for the Day: Why Halacha Has "b'di'avad"

There was this Jew who knew every "b'di'avad" (aka, "Biddy Eved", the old spinster librarian) in the book.  When ever he was called on something, his reply was invariably, "biddy eved, it's fine".  When he finally left this world and was welcomed to Olam Haba, he was shown to a little, damp closet with a bare 40W bulb hanging from the ceiling.  He couldn't believe his eyes and said in astonishment, "This is Olam Haba!?!"  "Yes, Reb Biddy Eved,  for you this is Olam Haba." b'di'avad gets used like that; f you don't feel like doing something the best way, do it the next (or less) best way.  But Chazal tell us that "kol ha'omer HaShem vatran, m'vater al chayav" -- anyone who thinks HaShem gives partial credit is fooling himself to death (free translation.  Ok, really, really free translation; but its still true).  HaShem created us and this entire reality for one and only one purpose: for use...
Post a Comment
Read more