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Thought for the Day: Growth Through Being Extremely Average

A TftD went out a few days ago that resulted in some backlash. I got some feedback questioning the propriety of including a certain story. I decided to ask my direct readership (those who get the emails, not those who read the blog) their opinion. I sent out the following survey:
Please choose one of the following options:
  1. Please remove me from your mailing list.
  2. Please remove that story from your blog and get a better system for vetting stories/incidents that might be too edgy.
  3. Please put a warning/disclaimer in future emails and on the blog.
  4. No worries, I am fine with the email and the post.

First, I got a nearly 40%  response rate, which is excellent in the world of online surveys! (That is likely due, in part, to my diligence in keeping my email distribution list to only those actually interested.) The results are in: Average of responses: 3.8. I have therefore left the story in the blog, but added some context:

Why is that funny? Substitute "teenager" or "celebrity" for "centenarian" and the whole interview never would have happened. That "joke" for them is simply that they expect that a centenarian is, nebbich, too old to have any fun in life. He is proud to report that he is just as disgraceful a human being as he ever was.

We know differently. Chazal know full well the challenges that we face our entire lives. I first discovered this when learning masechta Kiddushin, which relates a frightening and inspiring challenge that Rav Amram Chasida/The Pious One faced and triumphed. (Kiddushin 81a, also see the Guard Your Eyes website's excellent article: The Battle of the Generation). 

The survey gave me a lot of chizuk. First, 40% responded, so my friends/readers are engaged. Second, no one asked to be removed from the list, so I haven't gone off the derech. Third, and most important to me personally and my desire to grow in my avodas HaShem:  I have friends -- close friends -- who are open to criticize me when I need it. We live in a time of "information silos" and "social media echo chambers". People only want to hear affirmations. If all you get is affirmations, you can never grow. On the other hand, if all you get is criticism, you are likely to just close down... and go look for a nice, comfortable echo chamber.

I very proudly daven in a minyan that has knit kippot, shtreimels, black hats, and one nut in the middle who wears an Even Willams cap (and knows more about whiskey than you care). If everyone is against you, you are outside looking in. If everyone agrees with you, you are in an echo chamber. That's why I strive to be average in the extreme. That's not mediocrity, that is the sweet spot for growth.

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