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Thought for the Day: Do Not Take Your Spouse For Granted

When I first started becoming frum, I went to several shiurim on taharas hamishpacha.  One of the most important ideas I have ever heard was from R' David Jacobson (now in LA).  He was telling us that one of the rules is that a wife cannot serve food to her husband while she is a nida.  He made this important observation: "And if you'll say that even a maid can serve food, so what's the big deal, I'll answer: How dare you think of your wife in the same category as a maid!"  In fact, in another shiur by another rav on the general topic of how to view one's wife, we were told: Imagine the president of the US were to come to your house for 15 minutes as a special visit on his tour to meet real citizens.  Do you think you would ask, "Say, Mr. President, my dry cleaner is right on your way to the airport, I wonder if you wouldn't mind dropping my laundry on your way?"  Well, then, before you ask your wife something like that, remember that she is more important to you than the president of the US.  Similar exhortations apply to women, they just tend not to need to be reminded so often.

On my way to work this morning, the top dropped off my new bike bell.  My wife had gotten it at Jewel for a few dollars.  I continued riding and thought she will be going back to Jewel in a few days and its only a few dollars, and its probably broken anyway... then I thought, "Wait.  Debbie was very excited that she had gotten the bell I had been talking about for a while.  She certainly had my safety in mind and also thought it would be a cute present.  In fact, it was cute, and I put it on my bike right away when she presented it to me.

Sigh... I turned my bike around and found the bell cover.  It screws on and had come loose; it wasn't broken at all, just needed tightening.  So now I'll remember to check it every few days and that should remind me to check my shalom bayis every few days and make appropriate adjustments.  Maybe.


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