Skip to main content

Thought for the Day: Do Not Take Your Spouse For Granted

When I first started becoming frum, I went to several shiurim on taharas hamishpacha.  One of the most important ideas I have ever heard was from R' David Jacobson (now in LA).  He was telling us that one of the rules is that a wife cannot serve food to her husband while she is a nida.  He made this important observation: "And if you'll say that even a maid can serve food, so what's the big deal, I'll answer: How dare you think of your wife in the same category as a maid!"  In fact, in another shiur by another rav on the general topic of how to view one's wife, we were told: Imagine the president of the US were to come to your house for 15 minutes as a special visit on his tour to meet real citizens.  Do you think you would ask, "Say, Mr. President, my dry cleaner is right on your way to the airport, I wonder if you wouldn't mind dropping my laundry on your way?"  Well, then, before you ask your wife something like that, remember that she is more important to you than the president of the US.  Similar exhortations apply to women, they just tend not to need to be reminded so often.

On my way to work this morning, the top dropped off my new bike bell.  My wife had gotten it at Jewel for a few dollars.  I continued riding and thought she will be going back to Jewel in a few days and its only a few dollars, and its probably broken anyway... then I thought, "Wait.  Debbie was very excited that she had gotten the bell I had been talking about for a while.  She certainly had my safety in mind and also thought it would be a cute present.  In fact, it was cute, and I put it on my bike right away when she presented it to me.

Sigh... I turned my bike around and found the bell cover.  It screws on and had come loose; it wasn't broken at all, just needed tightening.  So now I'll remember to check it every few days and that should remind me to check my shalom bayis every few days and make appropriate adjustments.  Maybe.


Popular posts from this blog

Thought for the Day: Thanking HaShem Each and Every Day for Solid Land Near Water

Each and every morning, a Jew is supposed to view himself as a new/renewed creation, ready for a new day of building his eternal self through Torah and mitzvos.  We begin the day with 16 brachos to praise/thank/acknowledge HaShem for giving us all the tools we need to succeed.  We have a body, soul, and intellect.  We have vision, mobility, and protection from the elements.  Among those brachos, we have one that perhaps seems a bit out of place: רוקע הארץ על המים/Who spreads out the land on/over the water.  After all, it's nice to have a dry place to walk, but does that compare to the gratitude I have for a working body and vision?  As it turns out, I should; as explained by the R' Rajchenbach, rosh kollel of Kollel Zichron Eliyahu (aka, Peterson Park Kollel).  Your best bet is to listen to the shiur; very distant second is to continue, which I hope will whet your appetite for the real thing.

First... since we have dry land, I don't have to slog to work through even a foot…

Thought for the Day: Using a Mitzvah Object for Non-Mitzvah Purposes

As I am -- Baruch HaShem -- getting older, I am more cognizant of the fact that I'd like to stay as healthy as possible right up the moment I leave this world.  Stuff hurting is not the problem (I am told there is an old Russian saying that once you are 40, if you wake up and nothing hurts -- you're dead), stuff not working, however, is a problem.  To that end, for several years now I commute to work by bicycle (weather permitting, 30 minutes on an elliptical machine when weather does not permit).  I recently took up some upper body weight training.  Not because I want to be governor of California, just simply to slow down loss of bone mass and extend my body's healthy span.  Simple hishtadlus.  I have an 18 month old grandson who is just the right weight for arm curls (yes... I am that weak), so I do about 10 reps when I greet him at night.  He laughs, I get my exercise; all good.  (Main problem is explaining to the older ones why zeidy can't give them the same "…

Thought for the Day: Hydroponically Grown Humans... I Feel Sick

I am quite openly not at all objective about abortion in particular and the treatment of human embryos and fetuses in general.  I am, after all, the survivor of a failed abortion attempt.  Not "thought about it, but couldn't go through with it"; not "made appointment, but then chickened out at the lost moment"; but, "tried a procedure, but was unsuccessful in attempt to abort".  Nonetheless, I try very hard to listen to the liberal arguments (which I also used to chant as part of the general liberal catechism), and am genuinely empathetic to the plight of women who find themselves in that difficult position.

What I heard on NPR this morning, however, has left me feeling physically ill.  You can read about it, if you like, but here's the bottom line:  Scientists in Cambridge have achieved a new record, they fertilized a human ova and then kept it alive in vitro (that is, in a test tube/petri dish in a laboratory) for 14 days.  The scientist involve…