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Thought for the Day: Shalom Bayis from a Little of Challah

My wife likes her challah warm. In fact, we warm both challos -- even though we are only going to eat one -- so they keep each other warmer. I had an idea, though. I wondered if I really needed to have the challah on the table during Shalom Aleichem and Eishes Chayil. Of course, I went to ask the dayan.

Before mincha or just after ma'ariv is my favorite time for questions like this. I started davening at the Agudah for mincha/ma'ariv mostly to have this opportunity, in fact. Asking in person is *so* much better than a phone call. I lead with, "My wife likes the challah to be served warm." The dayan replied, "So does my wife." (You don't get that on a phone call. Just saying.) So I continued, "I was wondering if I could delay bringing the challah to the table until after Shalom Aleichem and Eishes Chayil so it will be a little warmer." The dayan replied, "In fact, לכתחילה the challah doesn't even be on the table for kiddush." I thanked the dayan and

... wait... what?! Kiddush?! But doesn't the challah need to be on the table for kiddush? "No, originally the made kiddush and only then brought the challah. See Tosafos at the beginning of ערבי פסחים; go look. But since we keep the challah on the table during kiddush, they made a whole ceremony out of it and it has to be covered."

I was honored by the dayan's faith in my to be able to find "a Tosafos at the beginning of ערבי פסחי" I looked around a bit and ddn't find anything. Then, the next day I saw in the Rosh on Masechta Brachos that I was learning a reference to said Tosafos. HaShem is very, very good to me. See P'sachim, 100b: don't bring the table unless you have made kiddush; and if (the table) has been brought, cover (the challah) with a cloth. See Tosafos, d"h "Tosafos at the beginning of ערבי פסחי" -- "the table should be set when you come home"; yes, somewhere else. Then the tables got bigger and it was hard to bring them between kiddush and the meal, so they just started covering the challos."

So that has become our new routine. The challos are in the warming drawer until after kiddush. We wash and I bring the challos to the table and my wife enjoys fresh, warm challah.

I thanked the dayan for the p'sak and for helping my shalom bayis a bit. The dayan replied, "It's amazing how much shalom bayis you can get with just a little piece of challah."

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