Skip to main content

Thought for the Day: Preparing to Lament and Mourn on Tisha b'Av

I got call a few weeks ago from the Riverside Sheriff's department (near Palm Springs, CA).  She asked if I knew Greg Bowden.  "Yes," I replied more than a bit puzzled since I hadn't seen him nor heard from him in decades, "he's my uncle."  Then she gently informed me of his recent demise.  Why we had not communicated in so long is irrelevant (and, at this point especially, water under the bridge).  We had been close at one time, though.  He was my mother's only sibling; the last of that generation.  I didn't cry, but I did feel a loss... or at least the echo of a loss and a sadness that I couldn't feel more.

I hate to be a downer, but the next "holiday" is Tisha b'Av.  Tisha b'Av is hard.  I don't just mean the fasting, sitting on the floor, not wearing shoes, etc.  It's hard because I don't really feel mournful about what we've lost.  After all, I've grown up in a world without a Beis HaMikdash.  It is hard to mourn the loss of something you've never experienced in the first place.  Each year I try to find some way to make the mourning more heartfelt, the feelings more real.  This year's attempt is to learn  איכה/Lamentations before we read it on Tisha b'Av.

As it turns out, I have a sefer from Mosad Harav Kook on the the five megilos.  The advantage is that it gives a brief description of what's about to be presented before each chapter, then a collection of explanations on each verse gleaned from our sages throughout the centuries that are brief, to the point, and deeply meaningful.

The first chapter starts (first 11 verses) with the narrator giving us the "backstory", as it were.  Yerushalayim is personified as a widow, bereft of husband and children.  Her pain is all the more keen because she had been the center of the world.  I think of Yerushalayim in her heyday something like the way we were taught to think of Washington, DC when I was growing up -- The center of power of the most powerful and respected nation in the world.  And now she has become a tributary.  Her close friends have betrayed her; bad enough they have offered no support, but they don't even show her any sympathy nor act toward her with any empathy.  The rest of her erstwhile friends have shown their true colors and become her enemies.

With all that, she cries only at night.  She is still regal, even if the world doesn't recognize that.  Her tears... so continuous that her cheeks are ever wet, are reserved for her private moments.  She will not give her enemies the satisfaction (and, to their shame, even glee) of seeing her mourning.  At night, though, when the world is quiet, her solitary grieving can be heard.

Now that the narrator has prepared us, her soliloquy is all the more poignant.  Her complaints and sorrow are deep, heartfelt, and absolutely real.

While one is allowed to learn איכה along with its explanations and the midrashim on Tisha b'Av... I am never up to that task.  May this earnest preparation be a merit to bring the redemption closer; even if only by a few moments.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Thought for the Day: Pizza, Uncrustables, and Stuff -- What Bracha?

Many years ago (in fact, more than two decades ago), I called R' Fuerst from my desk at work as I sat down to lunch.  I had a piece of (quite delicious) homemade pizza for lunch.  I nearly always eat at my desk as I am working (or writing TftD...), so my lunch at work cannot in any way be considered as sitting down to a formal meal; aka קביעת סעודה.  That being the case, I wasn't sure whether to wash, say ha'motzi, and bentch; or was the pizza downgraded to a m'zonos.  He told if it was a snack, then it's m'zonos; if a meal the ha'motzi.  Which what I have always done since then.  I recently found out how/why that works. The Shulchan Aruch, 168:17 discusses פשטיד''א, which is describes as a baked dough with meat or fish or cheese.  In other words: pizza.  Note: while the dough doesn't not need to be baked together with the meat/fish/cheese, it is  required that they dough was baked with the intention of making this concoction. ...

Thought for the Day: Yetzer HaRa -- Spiritual Force of Tuma vs Physical Ta'avos

In any project planning, there are two basic approaches: top down and bottom up.  Top down starts with describing what you want done at the highest level that seems reasonable.  You then break that down into a list of things that are smaller in scope (they only accomplish part of the job) and are therefore easier to actually accomplish.  That process can is then repeated with each sub-project.  Each iteration produces a new set of smaller projects.  For any of the projects, the level above provides the "why" for the project of interest, and the projects below provide the "how" for the current project.  Bottom up starts, as it's name suggests, from the lowest level -- here is stuff I know I can do, and proceeds by asking "what can I do by putting this stuff together?" For example, I have a project to slake my thirst.  Top down would start by a requirement to get a cool drink into a container from which I can drink.  That breaks down into: (1) fin...

Thought for the Day: Why Halacha Has "b'di'avad"

There was this Jew who knew every "b'di'avad" (aka, "Biddy Eved", the old spinster librarian) in the book.  When ever he was called on something, his reply was invariably, "biddy eved, it's fine".  When he finally left this world and was welcomed to Olam Haba, he was shown to a little, damp closet with a bare 40W bulb hanging from the ceiling.  He couldn't believe his eyes and said in astonishment, "This is Olam Haba!?!"  "Yes, Reb Biddy Eved,  for you this is Olam Haba." b'di'avad gets used like that; f you don't feel like doing something the best way, do it the next (or less) best way.  But Chazal tell us that "kol ha'omer HaShem vatran, m'vater al chayav" -- anyone who thinks HaShem gives partial credit is fooling himself to death (free translation.  Ok, really, really free translation; but its still true).  HaShem created us and this entire reality for one and only one purpose: for use...